Sorry, libs, the Great Barrier Reef is doing just fine (we know you hate the idea of this).
Publication: Not the Bee
A Woke Protestor Just Learned Why Heckling Ron DeSantis Is a Bad Idea
There are few things more entertaining than watching someone attempt to ruin a political event only to discover that the guy behind the microphone has apparently been waiting years for the opportunity to body you. No word on who the woman was, but chances are high that she won’t get many high-fives at the Soros family’s next political-chaos training session.
Leftist Agitator Who Climbed Big Ben Avoids Jail Time Because of “Poor Eyesight”
On March 8, 2025, 30-year-old Daniel Day decided to climb the Great Clock of Westminster barefoot in order to protest against Israel’s attacks on Palestinian terrorists. Day has limited vision and used a stick to help guide himself up the side of the clocktower. He stayed up there from 7 a.m. to nearly midnight while shouting “Free Palestine.”
Guy Who Admitted to Burning Cross in Chicago Park Is Asian Snowflake Who Hates Trump
Well, we knew it wasn’t an actual white nationalist that did this. It ended up being an Asian socialist.
Hispanic Texans Voted Overwhelmingly for Pro-Deportation Paxton to Replace Pro-Amnesty Conyn
There’s being rejected by voters, then there’s being absolutely embarrassed. That’s what we saw in Texas last night. John Cornyn, who outspent his opponent Texas AG Ken Paxton 10-1, was absolutely wrecked at the polls.
No, Trump Did Not Steal Your Joy
Politics has grown so large in our emotional and spiritual imagination that it has robbed us of gratitude.
No Kings Democrats Give Standing Ovation to Literal King
Here are Democrats, who’ve spent the better part of the past 15 months crying “No Kings,” giving a standing ovation to the literal king of the United Kingdom
Trump Discussed Assassination Attempt with “60 Minutes” and Boy, Did He Drop Some Nukes on the Media
That’s how you handle fake news media!
James Talarico Argued with a Straight Face That Jesus Is a Radical Feminist and God Is Nonbinary
This guy regularly says things that any biblical scholar could easily refute with their eyes closed, but he’s really confident and genteel in his stupidity, so I guess he sounds smart to a certain demographic of liberal church women.
Canada Is Now Euthanizing Twice as Many People as It Did Dogs in 2013
Yo, President Trump, Canada needs immediate liberation from their “free” healthcare system.
Woke British Historian Says Shakespeare Was Really a Jewish Black Woman of Moroccan Descent
At least that’s how feminist historian Irene Coslet has decided to rewrite the bard’s history in her new book: The Real Shakespeare: Emilia Bassano Willoughby.
Paramount Only Hit 1,300 Live YouTube Viewers During Free Premiere of Woke, New Star Trek Show
The Federation survived the Klingons, Borg, and the wrath of Khan. It couldn’t survive woke.
The ICE Uproar Is a Conspiracy Calculated to Fool Americans
The chaos erupting in Minneapolis isn’t an organic protest movement, and it certainly isn’t spontaneous. It’s coordinated. It’s calculated. And it’s deadly. Ordinary Americans are being played — manipulated into dangerous confrontations by politicians and rabble-rousing activists.
Minneapolis Rioters Steal Rifles After Breaking into Federal Vehicle
Protesters used a truck and tow rope to rip a weapons locker out of a car.
Let’s Talk About Miami’s First Dem Mayor in 30 Years
Mayor-elect Eileen Higgins has been a staunch leftwing activist in the community. She worked as the Peace Corps country director for Belize and as a foreign service officer with the U.S. Department of State. Her platform has focused on “affordable” (read: socialist) housing, expanding public transit, and climate change (because of course).
Bangor, Maine, Elects Woman to Town Council Who Was Previously Convicted of Killing a Tourist
While Angela Walker isn’t affiliated with any party, she was endorsed by a progressive non-profit group for the office, being one of three candidates they supported, all of whom won. Talk about a theme developing on the Left. Is everyone they elect a violent sociopath?
Transgender Rabbi for Mamdani Included in Ad for NYC Candidate
This is not satire. The only way they could have improved it is if the trans rabbi had been disabled and black.
Senate Candidate Who Hired Illegal Alien as Des Moine Superintendent Suspends Campaign
Jackie Norris, chairwoman of Des Moines Public Schools and former chief of staff to Michelle Obama, has ended her campaign for U.S. Senate. Perhaps that’s what hiring an illegal alien with allegedly false credentials gets you?
Turning Point USA Has More Than Doubled Its High School Chapters Since the Assassinations
Some good news in the midst of darkness.
Gruesome Newsom Joins Fellow Dems in Mocking Prayer After Minneapolis Shooting
California Gov. Gavin Newsom decided it would be a good idea today to double down on mocking prayer in the face of tragedy.
Authors Jake Tapper and Alex Thompson Should Resign from Their Day Jobs
Instead, they’re making money off the story of Biden’s decline that they were too cowardly to cover.
Nashville Middle School Teacher Also Doubles as Drag Queen
Well, would you look at that — yet another “homeschool your kids” ad practically writes itself.
Southern Baptist Leadership Has Become Woke and Cringe
The Southern Baptist Church, a denomination that overwhelmingly voted for Trump, has come out to condemn Trump because deportations are mean!
Popular Sacramento Gay Bar Bans All MAGA Gear
Wow, so much inclusion at Badlands, a popular Sacramento gay bar! Yup, no MAGA gear, guys. Somebody might get uncomfortable. Nevermind the sexual stuff going on in the corner, it’s the MAGA gear that’s making things weird.